Quarantine Thoughts - Day 41

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People like to tell me how much they dislike online dating apps: “Oh, it’s just not for me”; “Oh, people just want to have sex”; “Us girls get lied to a lot on those apps”; “Oh, us guys never get lucky with girls”; “Oh, I’m constantly being ghosted”...

Well, they are preaching to the wrong choir here! I’m all for dating apps, I spent almost a year using them and I met the love of my life through one, so don’t knock it until you try it, I say! Even though I have a bad story or two...

Seriously, now, not all people enjoy online dating and that is completely fine, but for those who are curious but afraid, let me give you some tips to make your journey easier.

1.    Always be honest! If you are looking for a relationship, say so. If you just want sex, say so. If you are looking for friendships, say so. Because people assume that dating apps are just for one-night stands, they are afraid to let the others know that they are looking for more than just that. And on the opposite hand, people looking for just casual sex can’t pretend that they want something more just to get in someone’s pants! Honesty is key.

2.    Don’t take things personally. Someone ghosted you? Let them be. Someone told you they didn’t like this or that about you? That’s fine, move along. The point of online dating is sort of getting to pick and choose. It might sound crazy, but that’s what detailed profiles are for! I bet you’re not just swiping right on everyone, right? So, don’t take it personally when someone swipes left on you.

3.    Careful with your feelings. If you are anything like me, you are a hopeless romantic. I wear my heart on my sleeves and if I feel a connection to someone, I give everything. Sometimes, you’ll think you are having great conversation with someone, or you had a date that went amazingly well, and then the person just disappears. Yes, that happens way too often. So, what I mean is, try to be you as much as you can, but unless you are 100% sure that the other person is not going to bounce, just keep your heart guarded.

4.    This one is the foundation of going on dates: Always tell someone where you’re going, when you’re going and with whom you’re going. When I went on my first date with my current boyfriend, I told a friend of mine that if I didn’t check in with her by 11PM, that he probably stole my kidney and to call the police. At 11PM, I was in the car with him and we were ready to go home when my friend texted me “How’s the kidney?”. It has to be someone who will truly check in on you, okay?

Don’t be scared to try new things, it can be lots of fun! As long as you know what to expect, and know how to protect yourself, you will be fine!




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